Captain's Log: An Odyssey Entry Sailing Towards Truth and Light.

Captain’s Log: October ??, 2021

I have awoken from a dream. My heart is pounding and the sheets of my bed are tangled and tossed from apparent thrashing. I cannot even be sure if my mind is still under the trance of the dream or perhaps, it has been a nightmare? I have just enough oil remaining in my night lantern to lead me to the kitchen galley where I must go to boil water for some coffee. Surely a strong black coffee shall clear my head and help sort this apparition, this dream, this night terror.

There is peace as I return and sit looking out the tiny porthole of my cabin. The air is cool and foggy. Even at sea, the smell of autumn can be felt. It is heavier, with notes of wet wood, decay, mold, and rain. The flotsam and jetsam that drift along side our ship is laden with dead leaves and broken branches which have drifted from shore. There is a sense that winter is on her approach and that life will be transformed into something much more protected, covered, darker, and deep. It is when the still reflection of a summer sea transcends into reflection of one’s heart. This is where my dream has apparently carried and left me.

In my dream, I have been running. Running. Running. I catch my breath and ponder. I walk a bit and then I start running. It is though the wind just blows for a short while and I must change my tact once again. This constant and continuous change has brought strength and perseverance in its wake. And now here, far out to sea, sailing solely, I am overcome with the knowing that there is no clear destination. In my mind’s eye, I have labored to paint the masterpiece of love and life. For a short while, the vision was clear. It was a short snippet that I played over and over. The storyline was bits and pieces of a grander movie but just jumbled up in clips and broken film. The epic long lost romance found, the beautiful house in the woods, and the remaining sunsets of life gazing on a small pond instead of the vastness of the sea…all this…epically erased in my dream.

I see me running in a long white gown. I am not sure if I am running away or towards. It doesn’t seem to matter at this point since I am out of breath and mind energy to continue the run. My decision is somewhat easily made while drinking the hot, black tincture of coffee beans and boiled water. The steam warms my face and permeates to my head. I can feel the clearing simultaneously as the sun rises in the eastern horizon. I hear the birds chirping which marvels me as we are so very far to sea. How is that they can reach us so far out? I am in a state of ponder, open to new thoughts and feelings. The birds seems relentless in their flights from one point to the next. Are they in a sense running too or is this life, where we set our course and then follow the map to the treasure?

My lantern is remarkably still burning and the sun is also shining. It is my choice to move from one flame to the next and so I shall extinguish the lantern and set my sights on the morning light. The light brings hope as it does chores for the day. The sea is no place to drift aimlessly so I set yet another course and prepare the sails, the crew, and the vision. My vision is still a flowing white gown and I am running…but, towards the light, as it is where hope and happiness, and magic happens.

Signing off,

Captain S