Using Creative Writing to Improve Learning Skills

Fantasy Birth Expectations

Growing up watching such fantasies created by movies like Cinderella and the like must have had more negative than positive impacts on the kind of marriages we see in our environment today. I think that what those illusions created for many forced them to treat their spouses badly because their expectations became extremely high.

How do we correct what has been taught in several movies and for years? It has become a part of today's culture to do a lot of these ideals.

I once saw a video where a lady rejected an engagement ring because the young man chose not to kneel during his proposal. Where did she get that idea from? Why did she think that to prove his love for her, he had to kneel to propose?

"And they lived happily ever after" doesn't tell you what happens when they have new challenges, what happens when they have babies, and the challenges involved with managing in-laws. It doesn't tell you about what happens when Prince Charming saves another damsel in distress and falls in love again.

In this part of the world, Nigeria to be precise, we believe in the ideal of collectivism. Foreign moves are made based on individualism. They can get married before informing their parents about their spouse. That's not how we get married here. Their culture is so different from ours, we must remind ourselves about that more often than not.

We must tell ourselves the hard truth and try, as much as possible, to be reasonable with our requests from our spouses. People can be reasonable enough to make reasonable adjustments for those they love but not ridiculous ones.

Lower your expectations and discuss what changes and adjustments you hope to see. Let's take baby steps before attempting giant ones. Let love lead us fairly and justly. We can have the marriages of our dream but not the fantasies we have reveries about.

Live in your future now.

*Ahamefula Mark*