Salt, Pepper, and Leadership

People ask me how I hold myself accountable.

The answer is: I stopped confusing accountability with control.

My general manager, Niles Harris, taught me years ago that accountability is tied to authority and execution. Responsibility is deeper. Responsibility means refusing to detach yourself from an outcome simply because you are not the one directly empowered to fix it.

That lesson changed the way I lead.

One day he walked through my restaurant and noticed several lights were out.

He motioned to the burned out bulbs and I knew immediately what this was about.

I was already preparing my defense.

"Engineering handles the lights. I called it in. They never came."

Instead of addressing the lights, he sat down at a nearby table with me and motioned for me to sit across from him.

He pulled the salt and pepper shakers toward himself and quietly switched them.

Salt on the left. Pepper on the right.

Then he asked,

"Look around the restaurant. How are the other tables arranged?"

I looked around.

"Salt is on the right. Pepper is on the left."

He pointed at the table in front of us.

"What about these?"

"These are incorrect."

"Fix them."

So I reached over and moved them back.

Salt right. Pepper left.

Then he asked:

"That's what you expect your staff to do, correct?"

"Yes."

"And if they didn't do it?"

"I'd pull them back and ask them to fix it."

He nodded.

"That is accountability."

He paused.

"They have a clear direction and the power to act."

Then he pointed toward the lights.

"Do you have the authority to change those lights yourself?"

"No."

"Does engineering?"

"Yes."

"Then you are not accountable for the lights."

I remember feeling confused.

Then he leaned forward and said something I've never forgotten.

"But do you see that the lights being out impacts your restaurant?"

"Yes."

"That," he said, "is responsibility."

"Responsibility is recognizing what needs to be done even when you do not personally have the authority, skill set, or direct control to do it yourself."

"The power comes from your willingness to intentionally and persistently engage the people who do have the authority until the outcome changes."

Then he gave me the lesson that stayed with me for life:

"You may not always have the ability to solve every problem directly. But leadership is accepting responsibility for the result anyway."

That is ownership.

Accountability is about authority and execution.

Responsibility is about commitment to the outcome.

Leadership requires both.

Ever since then, accountability for me has looked like this:

If I can fix it, I should.

If I cannot fix it directly, I still own pursuing the outcome until it changes.

That mindset changed the way I lead teams, relationships, projects, and ultimately myself.

The older I get, the more I realize leadership is rarely about controlling every outcome.

Most of the time, leadership is about refusing to emotionally detach from outcomes simply because they are inconvenient, difficult, or outside your direct authority.

That lesson changed the way I lead people.

More importantly, it changed the way I lead myself.