I'm going to be straight with you: I love dogs. The bigger, the better.
I have a big black dog and while she may not look it, she is super friendly and playful. I find her cute. Her name is Nikki.
A Surprising Observation
In the evenings, Nikki and I go for a run, a bit of exercise to stay fit. She soon grew excited each day as she anticipated our next run. I found our running session exhilarating and therapeutic.
However, I noticed something odd. Whenever my dog and I went for a run, I observed the look of the people we passed by. They had looks of wariness and fear. In some cases, it was pure anger.
I was confused. Why did they fear this lovely little girl? But then I realized, the same dog I find playful and fun, other people find her intimidating.
When we go for a run, from my perspective, I see my dog having a good time. But to everyone else, they see a big black dog salivating and rushing towards them. Their panic is justifiable.
The Big Insight
But this got me thinking: "Why does the same action evoke two different responses?"
In this example, the action was going for a run with my dog. And the two responses were:
I find it therapeutic.
The passersby find it intimidating.
So, I asked myself, "why would anyone think such of lovely Nikki?"
Well, the answer is simple.
They are not as familiar with the dog as I am.
You do not fear what you are familiar with.
It's a similar situation with your favourite teacher. They may be strict and "wicked" to other people, but to you, they are not.
How This Applies to Discipline
In the same vein, you struggle to get things done because you are unfamiliar with it.
Professional singers do not find singing as a chore. They have practised so much that they enjoy singing, they gravitate towards singing.
Someone who reads a lot has spent time building that habit. Now, they love to read. When they read, they feel in their element.
Why? Because they became familiar with reading, that familiarity made them fond of reading.
How to Use The Familiarity Concept
So how can you use familiarity to build discipline?
It's easy.
Break down the hard task into small repeatable bits of actions.
Repeat these actions with consistency.
Keep track of your progress (even when nothing seems to change)
Never underestimate the power of compounding small steps.
When actions are repeated over time, they become familiar. That familiarity brings fondness.
It tells you: "There is nothing to fear."
Soon, you will start to see the playful girl in the otherwise big, black and scary-looking dog.
Next Steps
If you want to build discipline and make hard things easy to do, here is a 4-step framework you can use.
I look forward to the great things you will do.
P.S.: Nikki sends her greeting (in dog language) 🐾