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2 min read

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Jun 13, 2023

You might think you’re the only one who doesn’t have it all figured out, or at least have it less figured out than most. I feel like that every minute of every day, but the world doesn’t stop there. Even if the worst happens, the world doesn’t stop turning. Sometimes it’s comforting, sometimes it’s that little tightening of the noose around your neck.

You can’t deal with it. That’s the truth; you live, love with that hole in your heart, present like a shadow until it becomes unbearable. That’s when you start breaking things down to the basics, my lungs are for breathing, my skin is for protection, my heart is still pumping blood.

A trick I found was walking. Feeling the wind on me, feeling it pass around me, not through me, telling me that I am making a difference. To the particles of the wind, but yes. A difference. And you build, you enhance that. The gravel under your feet has changed it’s pattern, the grass you stepped on has remembered your footprint. The noose around your neck, it leaves marks, but so do the strawberries you ate, the scars on ur arms, the laugh lines on a friend’s face.

So how do you deal with depression? You don’t. You let it sit, you let it breathe, you put coals in it’s mouth like it’s a dragon, and you feed it. But when it breathes fire, you get out of the way, and thank yourself for the shelter. You make the cave you sit in, as well as the bars on the windows. You do that. Instead, put flowers in crevices and give the dragon gold. Make it happy, until it breathes flames again.