𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐯𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐨𝐫 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞.
𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦.
Ive built 150+ landing pages. The #1 mistake I see?
The headline is about the author.
Put yourself in the visitor's shoes. They land on your page and think one thing:
"𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐞?"
If they can't answer that in 5 seconds, they leave.
Here's the fix. Look at these before and afters:
𝐌𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡
❌ Hi, Im Sarah, a certified menopause coach.
✅ Sleep through the night again, without hot flashes waking you up.
𝐁𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡
❌ Join my free masterclass.
✅ Get your first 10 clients in 30 days, even with no audience.
𝐃𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐭
❌ Welcome to Smith Dental. We care about your smile.
✅ Get a whiter smile in one visit. No pain, no long wait.
𝐅𝐢𝐭𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡
❌ I'm a personal trainer with 10 years of experience.
✅ Lose your first 5kg in 6 weeks, with 30-minute workouts at home.
See the pattern?
The ❌ talks about 𝐦𝐞.
The ✅ talks about 𝐲𝐨𝐮.
Try this 10-second test: Read your headline out loud. Then say "so what?" after it.
"Im a certified coach." So what?
"Sleep through the night again." Oh, I want that.
If you can say "so what?" after your headline, it's about you. Rewrite it.
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐮𝐥𝐚:
[𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭] + [𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐲] + [𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐠𝐞𝐭]
Your story, photo and credentials still matter. Put them below the headline, as proof.
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐟 𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮.
Go look at your landing page right now.
Does your headline pass the "so what?" test?
Drop your headline below and I'll tell you honestly. 👇