Are we measuring the right things, or just the things that look good in a report? A PageSpeed score of 95 on a website that converts nobody. A domain authority of 40 on a site that ranks for nothing locally. A bounce rate that looks fine because the tracking is misconfigured. The SEO industry has a metrics fetish. We optimise for numbers that impress clients in monthly reports rather than outcomes that actually move their business forward. Local search success for a small business is not a PageSpeed score. It is a phone that rings. Are we reporting on vanity metrics because they are easier to control than actual business outcomes?